The scene:
* Alone
* your favorite music playing – preferably something with some get-up and go
* Incense burning
* the room is dark and all the blinds are closed
* 4 well-placed candles are lit - such that you will be able to stand / lay down in front of the mirror and see yourself

The goal: to give yourself permission to arouse yourself

Caution: do NOT orgasm . . . this exercise is merely intended to help you explore yourself. The purpose is to explore your body without focusing on bringing yourself to orgasm. If you must “orgasm” then please follow use the “more adventurous instructions.”

The beginning:

Start by standing in front of the mirror with your eyes closed. As you get comfortable, start tapping your foot to the sound of the music. Feel yourself. How is each part of your body responding? What type of energy do you feel with the music? What is your body telling you? As you let the beat of the music take over your foot, open your eyes and see yourself. Say hello. Invite yourself to relax and enjoy.

Close your eyes again. And now let the music take over your whole body. Note how each body part moves. What does your hand feel like? Your neck? Your ears? Your knees? Your hips? Say hello to each body part and smile. Encourage yourself to relax and let go. This is not a contest. This is about you getting in touch with yourself and what feels good. You are who you are. Take a moment and appreciate yourself. After you feel yourself relax, open your eyes and watch yourself, then close your eyes.

With your eyes closed begin to twirl around the room and do a strip-tease dance for yourself. Do whatever feels natural. Let your clothes fly off your body in all the different directions. If you prefer, feel free to watch yourself. Remember this show is for you! Do whatever makes you feel the sexiest. Experiment. You only have yourself to satisfy. Laughter is OK.

When you are naked . . .

Put yourself in a position so that you can see yourself in the mirror. Now stroke yourself. Stoke your cheeks, hair, breasts, arms, legs, thighs, butt, knees and toenails. Do not miss any part of your body. Try doing this to the beat of the music. Depending upon the music you may need to use fast and hard or slow and long movements. Then try touching yourself at a different pace than the music would have you do. Remember all of your touching should be ways that you find erotic.

Once you have touched all your body parts – ask yourself which parts you forgot and begin again. This time watch yourself in the mirror while you touch yourself. Depending upon what you forgot to touch the first round, you may now be watching yourself touch your genitals, toes nails or ear lobes! If you can honestly say that you touched everything already, then simply touch everything again (hey, you can never touch yourself enough).

Once you have spent time touching your entire body, close your eyes and focus on whatever forms of touch are most arousing to you. Once you have gotten yourself into the groove, open your eyes and again say hello to yourself touching you. This is what you like.

More adventurous instructions

Repeat this entire assignment, but videotape yourself. When you are done, watch it. What is it like to see yourself dance? Do a strip tease? And to become sexually aroused? Afterwards, erase the videotape. You never know what could happen if the tape got into the wrong hands!